SCARED OR PHOBIC ?
We are all scared but when do we become victims of Phobias ?
Phobias, which can develop into severly dysfunctional perceptions, deductions and behavioral disorders, shall be dealt with skillfully without moralism or "von oben" arrogant contempt whether it shows it's ugly and threatening Medusa face in forms of a spider or in a crowded elevator. The psychological and physical reactions tell you that you genuinely are in a life threatening situation. The normal and rational thing any individual would do is to try to escape, thus often gradually developing an exhausting avoidance conduct with extensive limitations of the individual´s lifestyle in a number of fields and bringing family or loved ones into the dire dilemma.
With different techniques such as the fashionable Cognitive Behavior Therapy (CBT), and the various sprouts of therapies resting on this somewhat overrated branch, you gradually are being exposed for what scares you irrationally silly and forces you into an everyday life filled with anxiety relieving rituals or simply never to leave your home at all.
Confrontation therapy often is successful but explains nothing. If the underlying fear is not addressed there is always a risk for a relapse in one form or another.
The Generalized Anxiety Disorder, (GAD), far more widespread than what we are taught to believe, often develops to a handcapping stigma because of a sense of shame and guilt for the seemingly trivial reasons which trigger of severe attacks of stressrelated mobilization of the whole organism. Your narrowing world has an increasingly irritating and exhausting impact on friends and family who are obliged to become co-phobians, much like the loved one of an alcoholic, or give upon you and alienate themselves.
To be scared is a reasonable reaction when it comes to an almost infinite variety of situations which may include a real or an imagined exposure to what may be potentially dangerous to you. The only ones who are never scared will either be immensly stupid or psychopats. But when your fright starts to take over your life and cornering you into a poor existence, we consider it either as phobic or as a paranoia, the latter usually with a psychiatric diagnosis tag to follow..
Social phobia, the intense sense of feeling discomfort with meeting or moving around in social contexts, may often be a result of depressive exhaustion or serious mobbing during early and even adult life as two examples of the manyfold reasons. I, for one, have experienced it with abundance. The different avoidance strategies may seem creative and witty but will soon imprison you until you are incapable of getting through the day without a chronic stress mobilisation and wearing out your bodily organs in the process. There are numerous different reactions but gastrointestinal problems (BOW), exhausting tension related aches in your head, neck, shoulders, limbs and the whole muscular system, sleep deprivation, virtigo, (dizzy spells), fatigue, tachychardia with speedy heart palpitations, sweating, muscular migrating pains and many more which primarily serve as our biologically inherited psychological and bodily mobilisation of our defense strategies to either escape or attack which have, for various reasons, become chronically alerted, whether the situation calls for it, or not.
Cognitive Behavior Therapy is the most applauded of a wide range of therapeutic schools, partly because it graphically often results in visible evidence based improvements which is interpreted as a ”truth” by the adherents. CBT, however, never dedicates much time to analyse why an individual develop seemingly ridiculous phobias and the follow up is often poor. The phobia may return but resting of another agent of fear. You can feel relaxed in company of spiders but suddenly go half bonkers when you see a bird.
What is a phobia ? When does fear spill over into a phobia with extensive emotional, political, religious and social consequences ?
It has been stated that man is the only animal who can feel compassion, empathy and develop advanced physical, emotional and social strategies to show it and come to the rescue of, for instance, total strangers, risking her /his own life. That, however, is a myth, because the same conduct can be seen in different primates and many other species previously thought to only house instincts to satisfy hunger, safety, aggressiveness and sexuality, basta.
Today discussions about the massive waves of internet hate in social medias caused me to reflect on other phobias known as, for instance, xenophobia and homophobia. Taken aback by the almost infinite numbers of daily "haters" I must confess I start to seriously worry. Why all this hate ? Yes, I believe it has something to do with the "unreliable", confusing global state of affairs and pandemics. But not as the sole explanations.
If we choose among social theories and start with a fuctional explanation we would have to go back to where we once started, namely as a small, tightly united flock of humans amounting to a number of > 15 inividuals. The deviant, that is, a flock member going her or his own way, may instantly become a danger to the whole flock and will be aborted without mercy. If a total stranger appears, behaving by displaying gestures and bodily language which can not be interpreted within the conductural frame of reference, the flock will react acoordingly as to how threatening or absurd they find the unknown stranger. Experiences of violence, attacks, ambush, hostility etc, trigger off an alarm and emergency preparedness to deal with the situation, in early highly organized forms. Strangers, evidently, are more risky than the flock. And yet, wihtout them, we would die from in-breed and the embryo of balanced social inter-action is starting to grow.
The strongest sense of security is being felt when we, as an individual, feel a satisfying sense of participation, meaningfullness and emotional and social togetherness. We need to be a we and in order to achieve that we must be aware of a them.
When phobia extends to social or cultural conglomerates of a diffuse identity, number and content we, however, have lost the tools to deal with a comprehensible situation and start to attack on a massive scale: xenophobia, homophobia etc.
What do we fear on such an enormous scale ?? That every homosexual will be contagious or out to predate on your children ? That every Muslim from Indonesia to West Africa is compelled to slaughter you in the most beastly form possible ?What happens with the Amish youngster who decides to live”English” a little bit too long and and to be expelled for life ? Are they contagious? Will they turn the Amish upside down with novel lusts for Cadillacs, Internet porn and lavish interior decors ? A Cadillac would be no match for genuine faith, creed and piety..Or?
I never truly understood the religious squabbles until I found out that holy women and men were being ursurped to legalize secular greed and hunger for power.
If you feel secure and convinced in your creed I can see no reason to attack other creeds. To what avail ? Do you not trust your own religion or ideology? I believe that truly spiritual or highly rational beings do not attack at all except for in defense when somebody is shamelessly threatened, or maybe not even then.
”Thou shall not kill” of the three Abrahamic religions and in all other known creeds as well must be the single most abused comandement or recommendation of them all.
I find it hard to understand that a reasonably well off, happily married woman and mother, living with her husband and well provided for children in reasonable harmony far out in the Swedish countryside can become a ferocious viper and spit venom at, for instance, homosexual love and family raising. They cry out to protect their God...Or they may not care about religion at all, yet their reaction is phobic. I cannot remember Jesus of Nazareth ever mentioning homosexuality. Paul did. But he said a lot of other nonsense. He never met Jesus. He was brought up and educated in a Greek context. His attitudes had been formed by where he once was a child and young adult. Love, without malice or force, is that not divine love ? The highly pious muslim Mali woman grinding her corn and being the pillar in her extended family, is she also a scary threat to the world ?
To each his own. Those of you who will feel offended and rush to the aide of God have every right to do so. But I do believe that Providence is greater than all our opinions, creeds and mindsets together.
Every now and then I have been accused of being an ”anti-American”. Is it humanly possible to be anti every individual living in the United States ? I do not know them, each and every one of them. How could I be anti something I have no knowledge about ? To belong to a we, a comprehensible togetherness, lessens fright and opens up for tolerance without having to accept everything. The latter is as dangerous as the outings....
Douglas
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